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Reverend Laurie Sue Brockway, The Romance Reverend

Soulful Love
February 2003

A Goddess is a Girl's Best Friend by Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway
Rev. Laurie Sue's Newest Book:
A Goddess is a Girl's Best Friend

by Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway

Our Romance Reverend gives readers tips on how to get ready for true love on a deep and soulful level. Read on if you are ready to take the next steps on your personal road to romance.

Goddess Night at The Muse

Marry Yourself First...

"To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness."
--Robert Morely

There is nothing in the world that beats the feeling of falling in love and being in love! Many of us fantasize of meeting our perfect match and being swept off our feet … yet more and more of us think of relationships as a life partnership that gives us sustenance and allow us to share our selves and our love in a deep and soulful way. We long for a strong and happy unions and marriages, and home life that offers security and is sturdy enough to be the foundation for all else we do in the world.

With so many people expressing so much desire for true love, why are so many still searching? Why do many people fear love may never come? The reasons are many, and as complex as each individual who desires true love. Yet in my 25 years of experience as a journalist specializing in relationships, and then a minister, wedding officiant and spiritual counselor, there are two things that crop up time and time again. One is that many people tend to think magically about love without doing the practical and emotional work to draw a relationship to them … and keep it healthy and alive. And second is that many of us skip important steps to creating the relationship of their dreams by forgetting the cardinal rule of love relationships -- in order to experience genuine, mature love with another we first must love ourselves.

I have said it before and I will stress it again: Your first stop on the road to romance is with You! Looking for love externally, and even finding someone who seems to adore you, can be a fleeting thing if you do not have a strong foundation of self-esteem and if you do not continually empower your own sense of self-worth. It is the esteem of one’s self and honoring of oneself that opens the door to another to do the same. I believe this is a spiritual law that guides the world of love relationships.

I’ve witnessed regularly what is possible for women, and men, when they do the work on themselves that allows them to connect with another human being on a deep and soulful level. I see it in women who have worked on tapping into The Goddess Within and who have begun to see themselves as divine and hence are treated that way. I have seen it in men who, once unsure of themselves and shy, realize that they are worthy of the love of a wonderful woman. I see it all the time in the couples that step up to the altar on their wedding day and truly connect to one another’s souls with the deepest kind of love and communion as they speak their wedding vows to one another.

How do they do it? There is no magic pill. It is a combination of taking the steps to changes one’s self image and negative beliefs about love and commitment, and the sheer power of the universe, which will always work with you when you are working on yourself! Sometimes, it helps to fake it until your make it. I don’t mean that you should be inauthentic, I just mean it cannot hurt to "act out" the new way of being you would like to create … and do what kids do when they are trying to learn how to master things in the world. They pretend and play act. Play acting self esteem and love is not a goofy thing, it can actually be an empowering way to retrain your subconscious mind to agree that, "YES, I AM worthy of love, happiness and a great relationship with self, as well as others."

A Self Love Ceremony

There are many steps to the practical and emotional work that any one of us may be called to do in a lifetime and I advocate that you take all the steps you must to make yourself the best you can be, and to prepare for love in a sensible and soulful way (For more on that, check out Create Your Romantic Resume: A 30-Day Program to Transform Your Romantic Destiny, from Self Healing Expressions.) In addition to the more mundane and sometimes emotionally demanding tasks of getting ready for love, ritual helps to give us a head start on any life project. That’s why marriage ceremonies are so important. They create the sacred container for our goals and dreams; they give power to our aspirations for a loving lifetime relationship. They set the stage for how a couple in love will handle the challenges of relationships as they navigate the waters of life together. If you want to make a powerful statement about your readiness for love … marry yourself first.

Although it is not a legally binding ceremony, there is no rule that says you cannot evoke the energy of love, commitment and devotion in a wedding ceremony for one. Be a Goddess for A Day, or a God, and ceremoniously commit yourself heart and soul to yourself. Your willingness to take such a strong stand for love in your life will create miracles in all area of your life, for a self-marriage ceremony like any other big ceremony, is an initiation to a new way of being.

Love The One You’re With

When I teach relationship readiness seminars, I have people look into a mirror into their own eyes and recite vows to them selves. This is after they have gone through a process of treating themselves like divine beings, and have relaxed into a blissful feeling of appreciation of self. The following is an abbreviated version, just to get you started.

(There’s a very powerful exercise and ceremony in the chapter "Be The Ultimate Self Love Goddess With Venus" in A Goddess Is A Girl’s Best Friend: A Divine Guide To Finding Love, Success and Happiness, Perigee Books, December 2002, which I suggest you check out as well).

Preparation: For this ceremony, you will need: Ample time alone, something wonderful to wear, candle, flowers, paper or journal and pen, a mirror, music and "first dance song", celebratory food and libation (a glass of wine or grape juice is fine), anything else you would like to include.

  1. Clean house and make sure things are neat and comfortable before hand.
  2. Prepare a "reception", comprised of a libation and favorite meal or whatever would be pleasing (alcohol not required). You can prepare it prior to the ceremony or plan on celebrating by ordering in. Have everything you need ready and handy (even it its only a menu to your favorite take out place). It is recommended that you stay home and bask in the energy of your experience rather that going out dancing or out to eat.
  3. Shower or bathe, and dress up. You can buy yourself something beautiful, new and fitting for a bride or groom for the occasion, or just wear something that makes you feel good.
  4. Play music that inspires you and opens your heart as you prepare the wedding altar – in your living room or on a small table in your bedroom.
  5. Include a candle and flowers on the altar if possible.
  6. Be prepared to write – in a journal or on plain paper.
  7. Have a full sized mirror or hand held mirror handy.
  8. Make sure you have undisturbed time alone and begin.

Your Wedding Ceremony For One

  1. Light a candle and bring light into the room.
  2. Say a brief prayer if it feels comfortable: Divine Spirit of All There Is, please fill this place with your sacred presence. Support me in my efforts to express my love fore self. Help me see my own divinity. Amen.
  3. Sit down and meditate on the qualities you desire in a mate. Daydream about your wedding day to come and the vows you would like another to say to you, and that you would like to pledge to another.
  4. Write down three (or more) vows that are personally meaningful to you: "I will promise to love you through all time… I promise to love myself so that I can more fully receive your love … I am honored to have you in my life … I adore you … I love your strength and wisdom … etc."
  5. When you feel ready, look into the mirror and connect with your own eyes and read the vows to yourself. It may be uncomfortable at firs but you can transcend that. Know that your self-love vows will send a powerful message to the universe that you are ready for love!
  6. Celebrate your union with self with a sip of wine.
  7. Play the music of that "first dance," the one you hope to share with your beloved someday. Dance … and feel the love.

It is not part of our common experience to think of marrying ourselves first … we are more likely to dream of a wedding with someone wonderful. Marry yourself first and you will have married someone wonderful!!!!

© Copyright 2003 Reverend Laurie Sue Brockway  All Rights Reserved. 



What self-love vows would you like to make to yourself?

A Goddess is a Girl's Best Friend

Goddess Night at The Muse

Soulful Living Takes You On The Scene To Our Romance Reverend’s fabulous book party and celebration of feminine wisdom, beauty and inspiration in New York

Mingling, noshing, merriment and inspiration were all on the menu tonight, from 6 to 9 pm, as creative folks and media friends gathered for Goddess Night at The Muse to celebrate the publication of Rev. Laurie Sue’s, A GODDESS IS A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND (Perigee Books), the popular new book devoted to empowering women to have more love, success and happiness in their lives. The celebration drew many members of the press, as well as real live "goddesses" from many of the fields represented by the Nine Muses of Greek Mythology – writers, authors, television and radio personalities, entertainers, artists, orators and entrepreneurs. While the crowd was primarily women, there were quite a few openhearted heroes on hand.

The three-hour event was more than a book party -- it was an "experience." Produced by Rev. Laurie Sue and the extraordinarily creative event planners at The Muse (Francesca Gadaleta Giessman, David Dennis, Kerry Anne Watson) in collaboration with Perigee Books, it featured an ambiance and atmosphere of merriment and inspiration that both the Muses of Greek Mythology and The Muse Hotel are famous for!

"I feel like I am on Helicon Mountain, dancing with The Muses," said one reveler. "The people here are so interesting and the atmosphere is so inspiring."

The edible offerings of the evening were an appealing feast of fruits, nuts, vegetables, delicious breads, cheeses and crackers placed on an eye-catching banquet that recalled the days of ancient Greece. The libation of the hour was a fruity "ambrosia," a version of the delightful ancient "nectar of the Gods and Goddesses," created especially for the event.

Participants were treated to unique displays of many of the Goddesses featured in A GODDESS IS A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND and were able to see the pages of the book come alive through interactive altars. The wall panels of the Hotel’s Janus Room were lined with sparkling temple clothes, engravings, art and images of the Goddesses with explanation cards of who they are. Also on display were museum replica goddess icons that Rev. Laurie Sue has collected over time. Many of the interactive altars offered a simple sampling of ways to connect with the Goddesses – such as a love prayer to Isis or Venus, writing a request for inspiration to your Muse, placing a bindi on the forehead to connect with the Hindu goddesses. By the end of the evening, the prayer containers were filled with requests and many of the women got into the spirit of the goddesses and were sporting bindis. Some of the guys did too!

A "Goddess Squad" of Rev. Laurie Sue’s author friends and minister pals circulated the room all night, like real life Muses, helping participants offer prayers at the Goddess altars and answering questions about the emotional and spiritual significance of the Divine Feminine for modern women. The Goddess Squad included clinical psychologist and radio personality Dr. Judy Kuriansky, astrologer Shelley Ackerman, ritual expert Barbara Biziou, and psychotherapist and minister Rev. Ann Gordon.

Muse Event
Rev. Laurie Sue (right) celebrates with Goddess pal Dr. Judy Kuriansky (left)
and Mark Briskin, General Manager of The Muse Hotel in NYC.

Laura Norman and Associates, New York’s premier reflexologists, enhanced the experience by offering complementary "feel like a goddess" mini foot reflexology sessions, encouraging participants to feel pampered and divine. Reflexology is mentioned in the book as one of the suggested ways to connect with Egyptian goddess of beauty, Hathor, one of 31 awesome archetypes who are featured in A Goddess Is a Girl’s Best Friend. The Muses also are featured in their own chapter.

Many women dressed up in outfits that made them feel beautiful and divine. Rev. Laurie Sue’s simple yet elegant black pants ensemble was by Gabrielle Carlson, a designer devoted to helping women of all sizes and personalities feel and look like the goddesses they are!

There were several presentations through the night, beginning with the opening remarks from The Muse’s wonderful General Manager, Mark Briskin, a kind-hearted Hero who commented the marriage of The Muse with this book on Goddesses was a perfect fit. "Laurie Sue’s theme of inspiring women makes The Muse a perfect venue for this event." The ambience and the theme of The Muse Hotel is "Be inspired."

Rev. Laurie Sue offered an invocation to the nine Muses and suggested that with so many professional, creative people present that guests are likely to meet and network with many real live muses. She closed with a brief Native American style prayer for peace. Both came from the pages of A Goddess Is A Girl’s Best Friend. She gave a "Get To Know The Goddesses Tour" and there was also a wonderful Goddess Raffle that included gifts from companies devoted to empowering the feminine spirit, such as femailcreations.com and twosisterstrading.com.

Rev. Laurie Sue enthusiastically told the crowd that The Muse Hotel is a perfect representation of what she conveys in her book – that if we place ourselves in goddess friendly environments and include the goddesses in daily life we will begin to get in touch with, and honor, the goddess within. "To bring the Goddess into daily life is to celebrate our own divinity," she said.

"When I first walked up 46th Street and saw the wonderful sign for "The Muse" jutting out into Times Square I felt it was the modern version of Helicon Mountain where the Muses and Apollo would gather," she said. "The minute you walk into this place you feel you are in a venue fit for a Goddess, or God. It’s beautiful, comfortable, inspiring. They have angel wings in the lobby, goddess images in the rooms and the goddess on the soap! Then there is a the service and the way they put together an event – with such soulfulness and class."

Kerry Anne Watson, of The Zimmerman Agency, represents The Muse Hotel and can be reached at 850-668-2222. For more information on The Muse, please visit: www.themusehotel.com.


Read Reverend Laurie Sue's Past Columns:

December 2002 - "Who is the Goddess?" & "The Goddess Rocks!"

October 2002 - "How to Clear Your Love Clutter"

August 2002 - "How to Mourn a Broken Heart and Lost Love"

July 2002 - "Relationships That Nurture and Inspire Growth of the Soul

June 2002 - "Finding Peace in a Turbulent World"

May 2002 - "Sacred Sexuality For Modern Men and Women"

April 2002 - "When Someone You Love Pushes Your Buttons"

March 2002 - "When Life Has You Down, Remember You Are Loved"

February 2002 - "Plan a Valentine's Day Team Date"

January 2002 - "Do I Hear Him Knocking … From the Other Side?"

December 2001 - "How Do We Make Our Love Dreams Come True?"

November 2001 - "What is the Future of Love?"

October 2001 - "Getting to Know 'Lakshmi' the Goddess of Good Fortune"

September 2001 - "Can't Hurry Love... It Will Happen in Its Right Moment"

August 2001 - "Family Rituals Help Us Grow Into Loving Beings"

July 2001 - "Dreams Warn It’s Time To Own Your Power"

June 2001 - "A Fun Visual of Your Favorite Romance"

May 2001 - "Someday Your Mystical Soul Mate Will Come"

April 2001 - "Enjoy the Merriment and Fun of An Ancient Love Holiday"

March 2001 - "Nourish Yourself On a Date for One"

February 2001 - "Get Ready for Soulful Love"


Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway is an interfaith minister who is often called upon to teach, speak and write about women’s spirituality and The Feminine Faces of God. She is author of, A GODDESS IS A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND: A DIVINE GUIDE TO FINDING LOVE, SUCCESS AND HAPPINESS, from Perigee Books, December 2002.

For more information:
Website: www.GoddessFriends.com or to join "The Goddess List" for inspirational and informational electronic message, Email: GoddessLaxmi@aol.com


Visit Reverend Laurie Sue at:


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