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It's All About Trust
by Kay Allenbaugh

I tell you this story because I believe that it will relate to your life as well. Eight years ago, I was standing before a mirror combing my hair when a remarkable thing happened -- a mountain top experience! I was divinely inspired. I heard Godís voice tell me to write a book for women. His voice was calm, loving and melodic. His exact words were, "Write a book for women; youíre a woman of courage."

My first reaction was euphoria. I had heard Godís voice! Although spiritual by nature, I had never heard that voice before. When you hear it, itís unmistakable. It was God, and I felt exhilarated!

For an hour, my creativity soared. I knew exactly what Iíd do. I would collect true heartwarming stories from women that would encourage and inspire women around the country. I could visualize the book and see the difference it would make in womenís lives. I was in the midst of grace and about to embark on my soul purpose.

And then as quickly as euphoria arrived it departed, and my fear took over. God must surely have a good sense of humor. I certainly had never thought of myself as courageous. I didnít see at that time what courage I had. Although Iíd survived death of my mother when I was fifteen, and the painful demise of my fifteen-year first marriage these things did not come to mind. Instead, my small self had pushed itís way to the front. I found myself thinking, Who do you think you are? Youíve never written a book before! And even more frightening was the prospect of doing book signings, and radio and television interviews. My ego had already taken my biggest fears and projected them ahead to what Iíd be doing several years from now, not step by step.

Knowing without a doubt that I would follow the guidance, yet feeling way over my head (have you ever said "No" to God?), I placed one foot forward and one foot back. I did not trust that if God were involved, all would be well.

Because of our mind body spirit connection, my physical body reacted to my emotional fear, and I created severe back spasms. Talk about holding back the river of creativity with my body! So I continued forward with the project, not fully trusting that God would lead the way. My back spasms lasted a long time. (The physical disability that my mind had created took on a life of its own.) Barely able to sit down for the two years it took to complete my first book, I wrote Chocolate for a Woman's Soul standing at my computer! This book became a series of books over the next eight years.

The Chocolate series with eight books published so far has definitely been a God job with more than two million copies in print. However, in the beginning, instead of enjoying this beautiful journey Iíd been given Ė to hear Godís voice and respond Ė I fought it every step of the way.

When you get guidance in your own life, you donít need to resist it! I now prefer to think of this verse, "If you knew who walked with you, how could you be afraid?"

Weíve all been given a sacred divine gift called intuition. When we combine the resources of our head and heart and go to that deepest place of knowing inside ourselves, we are getting in touch with our radar-like, God-given guidance system. It is in this place that we can more easily get in touch with our soulís purpose. No one person receives Godís guidance in the same way. You donít have to hear a voice like I did, your Divine signs can come in many forms.

Listen for those whispers coming your way (that small still voice does not come when youíre rushing). Watch for the signs that seem to be meant just for you, see what kind of work brings you great joy. For example, itís those thoughts that go through your mind while driving and feeling relaxed. Itís those great ideas that come up more than once and linger there. Or, maybe you have a reoccurring dream about doing a certain kind of work that you love. Itís a knowing that if you had no limitations, this (whatever it is for you) is what youíd be doing.

I ask you to practice recognizing your God-given intuition or gut feelings so that you can learn to discern it from your ego. Suppose, for example, that you are looking to buy a house and you walk through the front door of your perfect home. The moment you step foot inside, you know that itís right. A sense of peace washes over you, your body is at ease yet you feel exhilarated. Even though you walk through all the rooms, you really donít need to because you know this is where you will live.

When practicing whether you are making the correct decision, ask yourself this simple question. Does this "give" me energy or "take away" energy to take this course of action? Your body will never lie. If you feel uncomfortable in your gut, itís not right. If you feel at ease deep down (even if itís a tough decision and even if youíre a little scared), you know youíre on the right track and following Godís guidance. Not all decisions are easy, but you still know itís right. Just as I knew writing the first Chocolate book wouldnít be easy, I knew that it was mine to do. I just needed to get myself out of the way! The difference is that you donít need to hold back the river of your guidance like I did and create dis-ease. I will never hold back and miss the glory of being on my path again! Because, when all is said and done, discovering our soulís purpose is what we are here to do. May you walk your path in great peace and joy.

Copyright © 2001 Kay Allenbaugh

More Chocolate Books:

Kay Allenbaugh is the creator of the nationally bestselling Chocolate series, with over two million books in print, is a writer and speaker who is known as "The Caretaker of Stories for Women of the World." She is currently collecting true stories for future women's and teen's Chocolate sequels. She lives in Lake Oswego, Oregon with her husband, Eric Allenbaugh, Ph.D., author of Wake Up Calls: You Don't have to Sleepwalk Through Your Life, Love or Career!


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